Alfresco

It was wonderfully late summer evening in Cremorne Point, Sydney, in March 1978. The air was warm and still and twilight was putting on of one of its best performances of the year. A perfect evening to eat outdoors. Just over from the balcony where the table was set for dinner, high up in a Stringybark tree, a pandemonium of Rosella’s and Rainbow Lorikeets were pushing the limits of decibels created by 22 birds. Their leader, Ross the Rosella, had just landed on a branch, wings flapping furiously as he called for their attention.

“Feathered friends, listen up. I just flew past an alfresco setting not far from here at about 4 lengths, and I have seen something most shocking. On their table was a bottle filled with red liquid that looked like blood with a picture of one of us on it. A Rosella. ONE OF US! These humans have gone too far this time. Come with me now, take flight, see it for yourselves”.

The screeching grew louder and louder as all birds flapped their wings and prepared for lift off.

Meanwhile, at the alfresco setting, a little girl sat at the table. She was 4 years old, and when told this evening she would be eating alfresco, not knowing what that was, her only question was “Can I have tomato sauce with that?”.

“Oh Darling, alfresco means we are dining outside in the open air”. Said her mother, who was flattered with her innocent naivety and felt a purposeful warmth through her entire body. “Dinner outside” she thought. “That is what it’s called. This will be fantastic!”.

It mattered not what was being served for dinner, after her first taste of Rosella Tomato Sauce, this little girl was immediately hooked. Every single meal would be accompanied by her trusty friend, the red bottle of Rosella.

The table was full of chatter; plates were being passed and loaded with food.

“Geez those birds are having a real go tonight aren’t they,” said the father. “

“Dad, May I have some tomato sauce please”?

He smiled and reached for the bottle and as he tapped the silky red ooze onto her plate, the little girl was fixated, not on the sauce, but on the picture of the bird, which was upside down and thought to herself, “I hope they don’t put real rosellas in it, because this sauce is delicious”.

At this very moment, the squadron of colourful birds landed with a commotion on the balcony railing. Flapping feathers and making deafening shrilling noises.

Ross jumped onto the table and silence fell from all present. In a moment of disbelief, Ross hopped towards her plate, dipped his beak in the sauce and paused. He sloshed it in his mouth as if he were a grand sommelier and swallowed it. Lifting his line of sight, he made eye contact with the little girl for around 7 seconds before winking with a very cheeky look. He turned to his flock and shouted with joy. “We are safe! Not only is this tomato sauce, but it is also the best I have ever tasted! No wonder they have put a picture of us on it”.

They flew off back to their tree, and the family resumed their Alfresco meal, and this shirt is even better than that story.